Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Fancy, Very Fancy!

Fancy Suitcases from Nepal

Warning, the following is not appropriate for easily scandalized adults or inquisitive children; it is perfectly acceptable for mature women and sensitive men.

I was sitting in a circle of three women on the floor of a tiny, one-room shop on Cape Cod. Crystals and pendulums, hanging in the windows, caught the morning sunshine and cast dancing rainbows on the dream catchers, singing bowls, giant minerals and exotic jewelry around us.

I was on a sales call where intuitive women were carefully selecting new jewelry for their shop from my elaborately decorated Nepalese trunks. Suddenly, a fourth woman burst through the door of the shop in tears and unable to speak.

"I," she started and wiped away some tears. "I just took my mother to the gynecologist," she finally blurted.

Our faces were turned up toward her with great compassion.

"It's been years. She's in her late seventies and I thought it was time." She took a few deep breaths. More composed now, almost mirthful, she was ready to tell her tale. "So I just went ahead and scheduled an appointment for her. Last night she was staying at my house, so I told her we were going to the gynecologist, and that was that! She got up early, bathed, and I drove her to the doctor's office. She didn't want me to be too far away from her, so I stayed with her just on the other side of the screen in the doctor's office. The questions were very routine at first. Then at the most sensitive of moments, the doctor burst into booming laughter and said, 'Fancy, very fancy!' Well, I was more than a little surprised, but my mother didn't respond and so I didn't say anything.
"After the appointment, I had to ask my mother what happened. She didn't know. She had no idea why the doctor laughed. I asked her if she had done anything unusual and she said no. But I kept pressing her and asked her how she got ready for the appointment. She told me that she showered and used the feminine deodorant spray and dressed. I said, 'Mom, I don't have any feminine deodorant spray, where did you find it?' And she said, 'It was on the back of the toilet in your bathroom.' When we got home, I went upstairs to the bathroom and found the can she had used. It was my daughter's gold hair glitter!"

Tomorrow, I am off on another sales call. Thursday I will be at a store in Washington, DC, called Transcendence Perfection Bliss of the Beyond. I kid you not! Peace!

16 comments:

  1. hahahhaha!!!! That just started off my day on a pervy note...hhahah

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  2. What a hoot!

    And those suitcases are very cool.

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  3. I love those suitcases. What are they made of? Looks like metal ..

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  4. Hilarious story and very fancy suitcases. I Like the cases much better than those black bags on wheels I see following everyone around the airports. Glitter hehe!

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  5. Hysterical! I'm sure it was a nice little surprise for the doctor.

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  6. We should all provide some sort of little surprise for our OB/GYNs - don't you think?

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  7. Seems as if your Mom displayed some Perfection Bliss herself..what a fab story! Thanks for the laugh!

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  8. LOL!!! That was a great story.

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  9. Heehee :)
    yes,and what is the story about those suitcases? now those are fancy!

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  10. Hi All, the trunks are typical Nepalese suitcases. They are made of metal and then painted. There is a kind of roller with a pattern on it that makes the beautiful designs. I used to bring back these cases with me every trip, but that was before 9/11. They have to be closed with a pad lock and pad locks are no longer allowed by US Customs.

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  11. This is quite a story!
    Suitcases are terrific I'll email you a photo of an amazing wooden Moroccan suitcase which my husband used for his painting materials.

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  12. There can not possibly be a store with that name inside the District. Maybe somewhere outside of DC, like in Virginia or Maryland, but here? Really??

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  13. Just googled it. Oh my god. In Cleveland Park. Wow!

    So sorry I'll miss you tomorrow. I have to cook dinner for 50 people!

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  14. Hehehehe...that is funny and rather cute, eh?

    Oh, and I am going to fantasize about those suitcases of yours! They are gorgeous!

    I hope you have fun on your sales calls...I've been making my first couple of sales calls these past few weeks but I haven't had THAT interesting happen yet!

    all the best to you!

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  15. too too funny - wish i could have been a fly on the wall for the dr's face!!! reminds me of when i was having total hysterectomy and my surgeon [also a close friend] had been really worried about me for several weeks - found what was thought to be bad news on the last tests before surgery was performed - anyway, i had been trying to cheer him up cause i knew i was fine but he was just not having any of it - he was worried - he had sat up with me in the hospital the night before till really late and after he left i decided to surprise him at surgery - so i had a nurse bring me a felt tip marker and i drew a huge happy face on my belly - well, while i was under general anesthesia and have no clue what really transpired, i am told that the scene in the OR was in hysterics - paul was speechless and couldn't quit laughing - as was the staff - in any event, my surgery was finally done - i was fine, just like i'd told him i would be - and i still laugh out loud whenever i remember that story! great post, lady!!!

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